Pregnancy
You are my little whale
Breaching beneath my skin
A tiny tremor
Slowly shifting tectonic plates
Your sign language
Leaves fingerprints inside me.
22/4/08
Friday, May 23, 2008
27 Weeks, 13 to go!
This week I'm attaching a copy of my fortnightly column that goes in the local paper.
What Would I Know?
An Interview
Okay, it’s time to come clean. Each fortnight my column introduces me as a “child education correspondent”. Well, the truth is, that’s about all I know – education. I’m about to have my first child and despite a four year university degree and nearly ten years of teaching experience, I can safely say I know nothing!
Fortunately though, I do know Gaye; mother of eight, grandmother to 1 and another grandchild on the way! Gaye is also a Teacher-Librarian and no doubt an old sage when it comes to raising children.
This week, Gaye has asked me a few tricky questions, just to see how prepared I am for motherhood!
1. What are some of the most fantastic old wives’ tales you have heard regarding pregnancy and childbirth?
It’s not the old wives’ tales that I find fantastic, but all the “new” stuff. These days you can have an elective Caesar, there’s gender pre-selection and heaps of antenatal tests available. Much of that stuff actually scares me, I think I prefer the old wives’ tales about long drives on bumpy roads and heartburn causing hair growth!
2. The first time you hold your baby and it wraps its little hand around your finger, what emotions might be invoked in you?
I think I might feel terrified, but also consumed with love.
3. Most mums feel that it is important to tick off the milestones in their child’s life. What are the milestones you are looking forward to in your baby’s first year?
To be honest, I don’t really know what a baby does in it’s first year. I guess it might grow teeth, crawl, eat food, walk and talk. I think they still need nappies by the time they’re one.
4. There is an old expression “to sleep like a baby”. What are your expectations about a baby’s sleeping patterns?
Okay – I know this is a trick question because what I expect and what I’ll get are two different things. I’d like my baby to sleep fairly regularly so that both of us (and hubby) can remain sane and healthy. Everyone says babies are noisy sleepers, I can’t understand this. What do they do that’s so noisy?
5. What would you consider is more important for a child – spontaneity or organisation?
Well Gaye, you’ve met my husband Matthew so you know that organisation comes first! But together, he and I are a good balance of spontaneity and organised routine so hopefully our child will get a good dose of both.
6. How can you make immunisation time as painless as possible for both mother and child?
Send the Dad.
7. What is the most amazing item you have seen which can be purchased for babies?
Well, first of all let me tell you about the electric breast pumps that are out there! They remind me of some of the machinery I’ve seen on local dairy farms! The most amazing baby product I’ve seen is a bouncer called a “swing”. It moves in five different ways, has a canopy, twinkling light shows, an MP3 jack and baby songs programmed in. I would actually like one for myself.
8. I am now going to mention three childbirth terms and I want you to tell me what they mean to you: Branxton-Hicks contractions; Pelvic floor exercises; and an epidural.
Branxton Hicks contractions are like Mother Nature’s version of a fire drill. They are pretend contractions designed to scare you half to death and remind you that the little sucker inside you has got to come out some time soon. I hope they are painless.
Pelvic Floor Exercises are the things I should be doing regularly throughout my pregnancy. Otherwise all the things in my pelvis could end up on the floor.
Epidural sounds bad, like the brand name for a power drill. Is an epidural when they suck the baby out? I don’t really know and I don’t think I want to know.
9. Finally, if I were a fairy godmother and could grant you three wishes for your child what would you wish for?
I thought you were a fairy godmother Gaye! You have to be close to something mystic to survive eight pregnancies and labours! Okay, three wishes...
1. Good health
2. A loving father
3. A loving mother
What more could they need?
What Would I Know?
An Interview
Okay, it’s time to come clean. Each fortnight my column introduces me as a “child education correspondent”. Well, the truth is, that’s about all I know – education. I’m about to have my first child and despite a four year university degree and nearly ten years of teaching experience, I can safely say I know nothing!
Fortunately though, I do know Gaye; mother of eight, grandmother to 1 and another grandchild on the way! Gaye is also a Teacher-Librarian and no doubt an old sage when it comes to raising children.
This week, Gaye has asked me a few tricky questions, just to see how prepared I am for motherhood!
1. What are some of the most fantastic old wives’ tales you have heard regarding pregnancy and childbirth?
It’s not the old wives’ tales that I find fantastic, but all the “new” stuff. These days you can have an elective Caesar, there’s gender pre-selection and heaps of antenatal tests available. Much of that stuff actually scares me, I think I prefer the old wives’ tales about long drives on bumpy roads and heartburn causing hair growth!
2. The first time you hold your baby and it wraps its little hand around your finger, what emotions might be invoked in you?
I think I might feel terrified, but also consumed with love.
3. Most mums feel that it is important to tick off the milestones in their child’s life. What are the milestones you are looking forward to in your baby’s first year?
To be honest, I don’t really know what a baby does in it’s first year. I guess it might grow teeth, crawl, eat food, walk and talk. I think they still need nappies by the time they’re one.
4. There is an old expression “to sleep like a baby”. What are your expectations about a baby’s sleeping patterns?
Okay – I know this is a trick question because what I expect and what I’ll get are two different things. I’d like my baby to sleep fairly regularly so that both of us (and hubby) can remain sane and healthy. Everyone says babies are noisy sleepers, I can’t understand this. What do they do that’s so noisy?
5. What would you consider is more important for a child – spontaneity or organisation?
Well Gaye, you’ve met my husband Matthew so you know that organisation comes first! But together, he and I are a good balance of spontaneity and organised routine so hopefully our child will get a good dose of both.
6. How can you make immunisation time as painless as possible for both mother and child?
Send the Dad.
7. What is the most amazing item you have seen which can be purchased for babies?
Well, first of all let me tell you about the electric breast pumps that are out there! They remind me of some of the machinery I’ve seen on local dairy farms! The most amazing baby product I’ve seen is a bouncer called a “swing”. It moves in five different ways, has a canopy, twinkling light shows, an MP3 jack and baby songs programmed in. I would actually like one for myself.
8. I am now going to mention three childbirth terms and I want you to tell me what they mean to you: Branxton-Hicks contractions; Pelvic floor exercises; and an epidural.
Branxton Hicks contractions are like Mother Nature’s version of a fire drill. They are pretend contractions designed to scare you half to death and remind you that the little sucker inside you has got to come out some time soon. I hope they are painless.
Pelvic Floor Exercises are the things I should be doing regularly throughout my pregnancy. Otherwise all the things in my pelvis could end up on the floor.
Epidural sounds bad, like the brand name for a power drill. Is an epidural when they suck the baby out? I don’t really know and I don’t think I want to know.
9. Finally, if I were a fairy godmother and could grant you three wishes for your child what would you wish for?
I thought you were a fairy godmother Gaye! You have to be close to something mystic to survive eight pregnancies and labours! Okay, three wishes...
1. Good health
2. A loving father
3. A loving mother
What more could they need?
Saturday, May 17, 2008
26 Weeks or 14 to go!
Just a quick update as I'm not feeling well today (sore throat).
* Ultra sound tomorrow to try and determine this pain under my ribs and before you ask, no it's not the baby's foot!
* Ante natal classes begin Tuesday night
* Doctor's appointment last week was okay (except for this rib pain), now have to start going fortnightly
* I'm teary and tired all the time
* Baby moving lots and lots and making me smile unexpectedly, I can even feel an occasional "rub" as a foot or elbow glides along my uterus
* My aunty Ivy (aged 87) passed away during the week. She was not well and it was not unexpected but sad all the same
* I've started prenatal gym classes which I'm really enjoying
* We have a "new car" - a Honda CRV and I think Matty's going to wash the paint right off it!
That'll do for now.
* Ultra sound tomorrow to try and determine this pain under my ribs and before you ask, no it's not the baby's foot!
* Ante natal classes begin Tuesday night
* Doctor's appointment last week was okay (except for this rib pain), now have to start going fortnightly
* I'm teary and tired all the time
* Baby moving lots and lots and making me smile unexpectedly, I can even feel an occasional "rub" as a foot or elbow glides along my uterus
* My aunty Ivy (aged 87) passed away during the week. She was not well and it was not unexpected but sad all the same
* I've started prenatal gym classes which I'm really enjoying
* We have a "new car" - a Honda CRV and I think Matty's going to wash the paint right off it!
That'll do for now.
Saturday, May 3, 2008
24 Weeks
Okay - time for another epic update...
I set off for Katoomba in the Blue Mountains where I had won a place at Varuna The Writer's House. The car was loaded with books, computer, printer, manuscripts, anxiety and me. I left a beautiful sunny autumn day to arrive in overcast, sleety weather and I was instantly homesick. I don't often suffer from that, but having to leave Matthew and my dog Shirl, combined with knowing my folks were in Bali (with my sisters) plus leaving Mum's little dog Peggy in Matthew's care was all a bit much. Plus, I felt like a bit of a fraud going to this highly sought after writing retreat that 370 others had applied for.
I cried and cried and wandered the streets in the rain. My hormones must have been going berserk, because that sort of behaviour is really uncharacteristic of me. My muscles were aching after the long drive (7 hours) so I decided to book in for a massage (I haven't had one since I was pregnant). And it turned out to be just what I needed. The masseuse was a true healer and something about her touch restored my equilibrium. I was able to enjoy my week and have many productive writing days.
The director at Varuna, Peter, praised my work and commended the progress I had made since my last visit there in 2005. The other writers were young and all in worlds far from pregnancy and children. It was great to be talking about "other things", especially my favourite things like books, authors, movies, stories, characters and the experience of being a writer.
I drove home the following Sunday singing along to my Josh Pyke CD at the top of my lungs, giving the occasional "woo hoo" out the window and thinking about ways I can carry this fabulous feeling back to my "real life".
Then it happened....
Traffic slowed, I was caught in a traffic jam, rain began to fall, my mobile phone rang... I answered (naughty, I know, but we were virtually stationary) to hear my poor husband Matthew on the other end saying; "I just got back from Surf Patrol and Peggy's missing. I can't find her anywhere." (Peggy is Mum and Dad's beloved dog - a tiny little thing aged 14) Matty swore a lot and then I felt the lovely Blue Mountain feeling lift away and the other crap feeling sink back in. How does that work?
Anyway, he called me every thirty minutes as traffic crawled along, eventually finding her in the reserve behind our street. Finally, I made it to Canberra where I had to stay for the night (as I had a course for school there the following day). I felt as though I'd run a marathon.
Just as I was relaxing in the motel, Matt rings again to tell me that Mum just called. She was home from Bali with some bad news. She'd had a fall while over there and broken her arm. She went for four days without medical treatment because she "didn't think the Bali doctors would be quality". She went to the local hospital in Cooma when she got home and - this is so sad - her fingers were so swollen that they had to cut off her wedding ring, which she hadn't taken off in 50 years. She has a compound fracture in her left wrist and will be in a cast for at least another 6 weeks. It worries me, as she is 71 and doesn't yet realise that she is actually growing old.
So - I spent the night feeling miserable, worrying about Mum. Even a good dose of pizza and TV (hadn't seen any TV for the week at Varuna) didn't help.
The next day it was off to a conference entitled Catholic Schools At A Crossroad featuring nuns and bishops as guest speakers. Yes - it was every bit as boring as it sounded. It finished late and there was still a 3 hour drive ahead of me. I arrived home at 7pm, wishing that the next day wasn't the first day of Term 2.
The next morning I woke up, sneezed and wet myself. It was at this moment that I abandoned all sense of courage. I sat on the bottom step and cried.
I did make it to work. I did survive the week. I do feel a lot better. So it all has a happy ending really!
The baby is moving a lot and my boobs and bum are also moving of their own accord - enlarging at a rate somewhat proportionate to my stomach. I no longer feel a constant sense of worry and panic about the baby. Every time we go shopping, Matthew insists we buy some nappies. I am considering busting a packet open, ready for the next time I sneeze.
Other updates: We are buying a "new" (2nd hand 2005 model) Honda CRV next weekend
Matthew sold his beat up old ute
Matthew's sister had her 2nd child last week, a baby boy named James
I went home and saw Mum on the weekend and she is going to be ok
School has been like a gentle haven from all the other stuff going on
This has been the first thing I've written since my week at Varuna. And I call myself a writer. Huh.
Big love to Brad and Bonnie who are probably the only two souls who will ever read this. Thank you for your thoughts.
I set off for Katoomba in the Blue Mountains where I had won a place at Varuna The Writer's House. The car was loaded with books, computer, printer, manuscripts, anxiety and me. I left a beautiful sunny autumn day to arrive in overcast, sleety weather and I was instantly homesick. I don't often suffer from that, but having to leave Matthew and my dog Shirl, combined with knowing my folks were in Bali (with my sisters) plus leaving Mum's little dog Peggy in Matthew's care was all a bit much. Plus, I felt like a bit of a fraud going to this highly sought after writing retreat that 370 others had applied for.
I cried and cried and wandered the streets in the rain. My hormones must have been going berserk, because that sort of behaviour is really uncharacteristic of me. My muscles were aching after the long drive (7 hours) so I decided to book in for a massage (I haven't had one since I was pregnant). And it turned out to be just what I needed. The masseuse was a true healer and something about her touch restored my equilibrium. I was able to enjoy my week and have many productive writing days.
The director at Varuna, Peter, praised my work and commended the progress I had made since my last visit there in 2005. The other writers were young and all in worlds far from pregnancy and children. It was great to be talking about "other things", especially my favourite things like books, authors, movies, stories, characters and the experience of being a writer.
I drove home the following Sunday singing along to my Josh Pyke CD at the top of my lungs, giving the occasional "woo hoo" out the window and thinking about ways I can carry this fabulous feeling back to my "real life".
Then it happened....
Traffic slowed, I was caught in a traffic jam, rain began to fall, my mobile phone rang... I answered (naughty, I know, but we were virtually stationary) to hear my poor husband Matthew on the other end saying; "I just got back from Surf Patrol and Peggy's missing. I can't find her anywhere." (Peggy is Mum and Dad's beloved dog - a tiny little thing aged 14) Matty swore a lot and then I felt the lovely Blue Mountain feeling lift away and the other crap feeling sink back in. How does that work?
Anyway, he called me every thirty minutes as traffic crawled along, eventually finding her in the reserve behind our street. Finally, I made it to Canberra where I had to stay for the night (as I had a course for school there the following day). I felt as though I'd run a marathon.
Just as I was relaxing in the motel, Matt rings again to tell me that Mum just called. She was home from Bali with some bad news. She'd had a fall while over there and broken her arm. She went for four days without medical treatment because she "didn't think the Bali doctors would be quality". She went to the local hospital in Cooma when she got home and - this is so sad - her fingers were so swollen that they had to cut off her wedding ring, which she hadn't taken off in 50 years. She has a compound fracture in her left wrist and will be in a cast for at least another 6 weeks. It worries me, as she is 71 and doesn't yet realise that she is actually growing old.
So - I spent the night feeling miserable, worrying about Mum. Even a good dose of pizza and TV (hadn't seen any TV for the week at Varuna) didn't help.
The next day it was off to a conference entitled Catholic Schools At A Crossroad featuring nuns and bishops as guest speakers. Yes - it was every bit as boring as it sounded. It finished late and there was still a 3 hour drive ahead of me. I arrived home at 7pm, wishing that the next day wasn't the first day of Term 2.
The next morning I woke up, sneezed and wet myself. It was at this moment that I abandoned all sense of courage. I sat on the bottom step and cried.
I did make it to work. I did survive the week. I do feel a lot better. So it all has a happy ending really!
The baby is moving a lot and my boobs and bum are also moving of their own accord - enlarging at a rate somewhat proportionate to my stomach. I no longer feel a constant sense of worry and panic about the baby. Every time we go shopping, Matthew insists we buy some nappies. I am considering busting a packet open, ready for the next time I sneeze.
Other updates: We are buying a "new" (2nd hand 2005 model) Honda CRV next weekend
Matthew sold his beat up old ute
Matthew's sister had her 2nd child last week, a baby boy named James
I went home and saw Mum on the weekend and she is going to be ok
School has been like a gentle haven from all the other stuff going on
This has been the first thing I've written since my week at Varuna. And I call myself a writer. Huh.
Big love to Brad and Bonnie who are probably the only two souls who will ever read this. Thank you for your thoughts.
Friday, April 18, 2008
22 Weeks
It's been a crazy two weeks. We had three visitors for the last week of term 1. My lounge room was like the United Nations; a guy from England a girl from Canada and three Aussies! It was great to see them again but it was exhausting too, trying to wrap up the school term and then come home and cook dinner, make conversation etc.
My Mum and Dad have gone to Bali with my sisters and their families. I miss them and worry about them.
But other than that, everything is going well. We saw the doctor on Thursday and he said everything looked "perfect" both on the scan and according to my blood pressure and measurements.
I can feel the baby kicking and moving often and it is such a good feeling. I feel like asking everyone "Did you feel that?" As though it's an earth tremour everyone could experience!
I've spent the first part of the holidays camping and then back at home "nesting". I've begun preparing a nursery and cleaned out cupboards that were long overdue. I really enjoy being in my home and sorting through things and organising stuff, but it is hard work and I have been sleeping for ten and eleven hours each night.
This week though - a well earned rest. I am going to the Blue Mountains near Sydney for one week. I won a place at Varuna the Writer's House (one of five places from 375 applicants!!). At Varuna I can work on my manuscript. It's a young adult fiction about a 17 year old boy and I've called the story Measuring Up. It's about his journey through that final school year and the way he changes his perception of himself and his relationships, how he defines himself.
I've meddled around in the writing world for a while with some small successes but no publishing deals yet. I mainly write for young adults.
Anyway I had best sign off. We are going to Bateman's Bay to look at a car. Another big "people mover" to replace Matt's ute. Matt's in a frenzy about getting away on time and running to schedule. I love him but sometimes I just want to give him an enema to help relieve his anal retentive tendancies.
My Mum and Dad have gone to Bali with my sisters and their families. I miss them and worry about them.
But other than that, everything is going well. We saw the doctor on Thursday and he said everything looked "perfect" both on the scan and according to my blood pressure and measurements.
I can feel the baby kicking and moving often and it is such a good feeling. I feel like asking everyone "Did you feel that?" As though it's an earth tremour everyone could experience!
I've spent the first part of the holidays camping and then back at home "nesting". I've begun preparing a nursery and cleaned out cupboards that were long overdue. I really enjoy being in my home and sorting through things and organising stuff, but it is hard work and I have been sleeping for ten and eleven hours each night.
This week though - a well earned rest. I am going to the Blue Mountains near Sydney for one week. I won a place at Varuna the Writer's House (one of five places from 375 applicants!!). At Varuna I can work on my manuscript. It's a young adult fiction about a 17 year old boy and I've called the story Measuring Up. It's about his journey through that final school year and the way he changes his perception of himself and his relationships, how he defines himself.
I've meddled around in the writing world for a while with some small successes but no publishing deals yet. I mainly write for young adults.
Anyway I had best sign off. We are going to Bateman's Bay to look at a car. Another big "people mover" to replace Matt's ute. Matt's in a frenzy about getting away on time and running to schedule. I love him but sometimes I just want to give him an enema to help relieve his anal retentive tendancies.
Friday, April 4, 2008
20 Weeks
It's lunchtime on Saturday and I'm still in my PJ's. Matt's playing golf and I slept until 10. Life is good!
We had the 2nd Trimester Ultrasound on Wednesday and according to one of the pictures, my baby is the love-child from the rock group KISS. The ultra sound technician was most impressed with the image that screened so well we could see the baby's eye lenses even through the closed lids - she printed it out quickly and we tried not to look astonished! We are having an alien!
The other images she printed were great. One is a gorgeous sleeping baby. The other image shows the feet. You can count the ten toes! Everything measured in correctly at 19 weeks except for the legs which measure at 21 weeks! (I have long legs and both Matt and I are near to 6 ft).
We saw the heart, kidneys, stomach, lips, ears, eyes, legs, arms, spine etc. She took lots of measurements and assured us that the kidneys and bladder appeared to be working and that things seemed ok. The technicians are always pretty guarded though, I guess they're not doctors and can't tell you too much. I wished she would tell me my child was 100% perfect and healthy and would grow to solve the challenge of world peace, cure cancer and bring back into balance the environmental disasters we are facing. (I don't want much!!)
It was exciting to see the baby on screen but it felt surreal. It was like I was watching 60 minutes and they were showing an ultrasound. It didn't feel like my ultrasound, like our baby we were seeing!
So back to the doctor on Monday and he will have looked at the images and no doubt assure me that I have a world changing young person in-utero.
I told the kids at school this week. Here are two of my favourite responses:
From a 5 year old boy "You should name the baby Princess"
From a 5 year old girl "You know that baby's drinking your blood right now."
All the kids and parents were really happy for me and for Matt. I've been given plenty of hugs, some cards and gifts and lots of well-wishes already. There's much excitement and speculation about the name, gender and due date. Most touching are the Mums who ask if I'll return to work at this school and I've been told "We'd hate to lose you" many times.
This week we test drove a second hand Honda CRV. We are looking for something to replace Matt's ute that only seats two. I drive a little zippy Holden Astra Hatchback which we'll keep for me and the bub, but now we need a family car. The same day I drove home the Honda (a big SUV), a friend gave me her baby car seat and a baby bassinet. I drove home and nearly ran off the road when I looked in the rear vision mirror and saw a car seat and all the baby stuff. I thought "Holy Crap - I'm a soccer mum!"
I'm very tired this week. Kindergarten is a busy place - swimming carnival on Tuesday, Pirate Party on Thursday, Major Assembly on next Monday, Cross Country Carnival next week. Being pregnant has put a bit of a handbrake on my energy levels and by 3:30pm I'm ready for bed.
On Thursday, we visited a friend who has a five week old baby (her first). She was sitting on the lounge, breast feeding with the remote in her hand. And whilst I'm sure she'd had a tough day I was a little peeved when she looked at me, slumped on the lounge and said - "You seem a little stressed, are you worried about how it's all going to go?" And whilst I know she was well-intentioned, I felt like saying: "I have just dealt with 25 kids - helped them make pirate hats and pirate parrots and hosted a pirate party to celebrate the letter P. I did playground duty, tied up shoelaces, dealt with parents and searched through lost property for a hat with no name. This is not stress on my face, it's fatigue. How was Oprah today?" Hmmm - yes and maybe a touch hormonal as I reflect on it now!!
I hope you're all having a great weekend. If not, put your PJ's on. It helps.
We had the 2nd Trimester Ultrasound on Wednesday and according to one of the pictures, my baby is the love-child from the rock group KISS. The ultra sound technician was most impressed with the image that screened so well we could see the baby's eye lenses even through the closed lids - she printed it out quickly and we tried not to look astonished! We are having an alien!
The other images she printed were great. One is a gorgeous sleeping baby. The other image shows the feet. You can count the ten toes! Everything measured in correctly at 19 weeks except for the legs which measure at 21 weeks! (I have long legs and both Matt and I are near to 6 ft).
We saw the heart, kidneys, stomach, lips, ears, eyes, legs, arms, spine etc. She took lots of measurements and assured us that the kidneys and bladder appeared to be working and that things seemed ok. The technicians are always pretty guarded though, I guess they're not doctors and can't tell you too much. I wished she would tell me my child was 100% perfect and healthy and would grow to solve the challenge of world peace, cure cancer and bring back into balance the environmental disasters we are facing. (I don't want much!!)
It was exciting to see the baby on screen but it felt surreal. It was like I was watching 60 minutes and they were showing an ultrasound. It didn't feel like my ultrasound, like our baby we were seeing!
So back to the doctor on Monday and he will have looked at the images and no doubt assure me that I have a world changing young person in-utero.
I told the kids at school this week. Here are two of my favourite responses:
From a 5 year old boy "You should name the baby Princess"
From a 5 year old girl "You know that baby's drinking your blood right now."
All the kids and parents were really happy for me and for Matt. I've been given plenty of hugs, some cards and gifts and lots of well-wishes already. There's much excitement and speculation about the name, gender and due date. Most touching are the Mums who ask if I'll return to work at this school and I've been told "We'd hate to lose you" many times.
This week we test drove a second hand Honda CRV. We are looking for something to replace Matt's ute that only seats two. I drive a little zippy Holden Astra Hatchback which we'll keep for me and the bub, but now we need a family car. The same day I drove home the Honda (a big SUV), a friend gave me her baby car seat and a baby bassinet. I drove home and nearly ran off the road when I looked in the rear vision mirror and saw a car seat and all the baby stuff. I thought "Holy Crap - I'm a soccer mum!"
I'm very tired this week. Kindergarten is a busy place - swimming carnival on Tuesday, Pirate Party on Thursday, Major Assembly on next Monday, Cross Country Carnival next week. Being pregnant has put a bit of a handbrake on my energy levels and by 3:30pm I'm ready for bed.
On Thursday, we visited a friend who has a five week old baby (her first). She was sitting on the lounge, breast feeding with the remote in her hand. And whilst I'm sure she'd had a tough day I was a little peeved when she looked at me, slumped on the lounge and said - "You seem a little stressed, are you worried about how it's all going to go?" And whilst I know she was well-intentioned, I felt like saying: "I have just dealt with 25 kids - helped them make pirate hats and pirate parrots and hosted a pirate party to celebrate the letter P. I did playground duty, tied up shoelaces, dealt with parents and searched through lost property for a hat with no name. This is not stress on my face, it's fatigue. How was Oprah today?" Hmmm - yes and maybe a touch hormonal as I reflect on it now!!
I hope you're all having a great weekend. If not, put your PJ's on. It helps.
Sunday, March 30, 2008
19 Weeks
First of all - I'm sorry Uncle Brad. We had visitors over Easter and it was hard to get a minute alone to post last weekend. Here's a lengthy update....
19 Weeks!
I can hardly believe it. Every morning I wake up and there’s that tiny milli-second before you even remember who you are. Then I become conscious and quickly check my tummy to feel if what I think I know is real!
I have gained 6kgs since conception and now weight 70kgs. My “bump” has completely popped out and I’m beginning to feel less like I’m fat and more like I’m pregnant! Yesterday Matt and I drove to Bateman’s Bay so I could buy some maternity clothes at K-Mart. It felt so good to put something on that actually fit. I’ve been wearing my pants and shorts with one button undone and occasionally, the zip pulled down as well!
The absolute most exciting thing is the movement. From 16 ½ weeks I’ve been feeling little kicks and rolls. The very first flutter I ever felt was at 14 weeks, but back then I couldn’t be sure. It was like a bird was flapping in my uterus! Now, I’m certain of what I feel. Sometimes I can (and Matthew can) even feel the little punch on the outside. It reminds me of popcorn – like a little piece popping up to touch the lid of the saucepan. I love it when I feel it – I get this goofy smile on my face and it’s nearly impossible not to touch my stomach and ask others – did you feel that? It’s like my own private mini-earth tremor and I can’t believe everyone around me doesn’t have the same sense of wonder on their faces when it happens!
I also feel it roll sometimes. The first time that happened I was laying in bed and I thought an alien was going to burst up out of my skin. It was the strangest sensation. Now that I’m more familiar with it, I can enjoy it more. After it rolls I can usually feel with my hands where it is. Sometimes I’m sure I can feel something harder and rounder like maybe a head or back and other times something just small and firm like maybe a leg.
Last week I had a scary moment. It was Thursday and I was at school. I had had some twingey pain under my right rib all day but I wasn’t in pain, just a little uncomfortable. My class were about to go to Library, it was lunch time and I popped down to the loo (toilet) only to find two tiny spots on my undies – reminiscent of the whole spotting-bleeding saga back at 7 weeks. I panicked in a full Lady MacBeth kind of way (out damn spot) thinking that something terrible was beginning.
I left my kids with the teacher librarian and called Matty and went straight to the doctors. They fitted me in straight away. For some reason, even though I was worried I didn’t have that deep worry that I had back at 7 weeks. I could feel the baby kicking me as I drove along and I knew somehow that everything was going to be okay. At the doctors, he immediately did an ultrasound scan and reassured me that everything was fine. We saw the four chambers of the heart – beating away healthily. There was a student doctor in the room too and I think she was more excited that me to see the heart chambers! I was just so relieved. The spotting did not continue (and I wonder now if it really was spotting) and the pain was put down to ligaments shifting, pressure on the bladder, changing shape etc. I have felt some twinges of pain since then, but nothing to worry about.
So today the big news is going in the school Newsletter. A kid at school (local mouth from the south) has already asked me if I’m pregnant and I’m sure some of the mothers are looking at me knowingly!!
We’ve started gathering up all the bits and pieces people are lending us and giving us – cradle, blankets, clothes, bootees and so on. It is a lovely and exciting time. Last weekend I started crotcheting a baby rug. The child may be 21 before it’s completed, but it’s the thought that counts!!
On Wednesday we’re having a long ultrasound that takes about an hour. It is done at Radiology and I can’t wait. People have told me the medical imaging is amazing. But, then again, this whole experience is amazing. With each passing day I’m becoming more and more excited.
19 Weeks!
I can hardly believe it. Every morning I wake up and there’s that tiny milli-second before you even remember who you are. Then I become conscious and quickly check my tummy to feel if what I think I know is real!
I have gained 6kgs since conception and now weight 70kgs. My “bump” has completely popped out and I’m beginning to feel less like I’m fat and more like I’m pregnant! Yesterday Matt and I drove to Bateman’s Bay so I could buy some maternity clothes at K-Mart. It felt so good to put something on that actually fit. I’ve been wearing my pants and shorts with one button undone and occasionally, the zip pulled down as well!
The absolute most exciting thing is the movement. From 16 ½ weeks I’ve been feeling little kicks and rolls. The very first flutter I ever felt was at 14 weeks, but back then I couldn’t be sure. It was like a bird was flapping in my uterus! Now, I’m certain of what I feel. Sometimes I can (and Matthew can) even feel the little punch on the outside. It reminds me of popcorn – like a little piece popping up to touch the lid of the saucepan. I love it when I feel it – I get this goofy smile on my face and it’s nearly impossible not to touch my stomach and ask others – did you feel that? It’s like my own private mini-earth tremor and I can’t believe everyone around me doesn’t have the same sense of wonder on their faces when it happens!
I also feel it roll sometimes. The first time that happened I was laying in bed and I thought an alien was going to burst up out of my skin. It was the strangest sensation. Now that I’m more familiar with it, I can enjoy it more. After it rolls I can usually feel with my hands where it is. Sometimes I’m sure I can feel something harder and rounder like maybe a head or back and other times something just small and firm like maybe a leg.
Last week I had a scary moment. It was Thursday and I was at school. I had had some twingey pain under my right rib all day but I wasn’t in pain, just a little uncomfortable. My class were about to go to Library, it was lunch time and I popped down to the loo (toilet) only to find two tiny spots on my undies – reminiscent of the whole spotting-bleeding saga back at 7 weeks. I panicked in a full Lady MacBeth kind of way (out damn spot) thinking that something terrible was beginning.
I left my kids with the teacher librarian and called Matty and went straight to the doctors. They fitted me in straight away. For some reason, even though I was worried I didn’t have that deep worry that I had back at 7 weeks. I could feel the baby kicking me as I drove along and I knew somehow that everything was going to be okay. At the doctors, he immediately did an ultrasound scan and reassured me that everything was fine. We saw the four chambers of the heart – beating away healthily. There was a student doctor in the room too and I think she was more excited that me to see the heart chambers! I was just so relieved. The spotting did not continue (and I wonder now if it really was spotting) and the pain was put down to ligaments shifting, pressure on the bladder, changing shape etc. I have felt some twinges of pain since then, but nothing to worry about.
So today the big news is going in the school Newsletter. A kid at school (local mouth from the south) has already asked me if I’m pregnant and I’m sure some of the mothers are looking at me knowingly!!
We’ve started gathering up all the bits and pieces people are lending us and giving us – cradle, blankets, clothes, bootees and so on. It is a lovely and exciting time. Last weekend I started crotcheting a baby rug. The child may be 21 before it’s completed, but it’s the thought that counts!!
On Wednesday we’re having a long ultrasound that takes about an hour. It is done at Radiology and I can’t wait. People have told me the medical imaging is amazing. But, then again, this whole experience is amazing. With each passing day I’m becoming more and more excited.
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